A haiku about Mario Kart
Are you kidding me
Who the fuck threw that blue shell
I will fuck you up
June 2013
83 posts
I used to be so bad with accepting compliments that giving me compliments was like handing me a newborn
sometimes i have like really deep thoughts like the internet is fucking incredible man i can go on google and see like 10,000 dicks in an hour and like imagine back before the internet even, you couldn’t see that many dicks in a life time. I’ve seen more dicks this week than any Babylonian prostitute did in her entire life. Amazing.
if a girl says she wants to cut her hair short and your first response is “i dont like girls with short hair” i will shit in your mouth while you sleep
if u smash snails on purpose ur a fuckin piece of shit they are tiny cuties trying 2 get somewhere as fast as they can pls help them out
FINALLY. A fellow snail enthusiast. The same with pouring salt on them >:(
if you ever hurt an animal on purpose you’re a fucking piece of shit
please be nice to dogs
birds are so ridiculous how do they even all exist???
fuckin
crazy ass
bobbleheaded
tiny motherfuckin
i dont even
things that dont make any sense
dragon faced
jesus christ is that a duck
some kind of prehistoric nonsense
holy shit where is your beak even birds, BIRDS
what if grass licked your feet when you stepped on it
remember back in like 5th grade when everyone vowed they would never do drugs
excuse you
what if snails had really small legs
No what if they had really long legs like
we all used to listen to shitty music so don’t act like you’re better than anyone else
- Sext: I kiss you deeply as I lay you back gently on the bed, my hands roaming up your thighs, palms are sweaty, knees weak arms spaghetti
- Sext: I kiss you deeply as I lay you back gently on the bed, my hands roaming up your thighs, palms are sweaty, knees weak arms spaghetti
people underestimate my ability to cut them out of my life when they fuck me over
